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Living Like Rita

I am a happy and proud mother of a three-year-old girl. And I am one of those cruel AF moms who make their kids do some housework. But is really as bad as it sounds at first?

When I was kid, my mom used to tidy and clean our house all the time. We had lots of arguments because I couldn't and didn't want to keep up with her. When I was younger, I didn't have to do anything and when I became a bit older and my mom wanted me to help, I just didn't want to do it. When I moved out at the age 18, learning to take care of myself was a painful procedure. I couldn't clean, do the laundry or cook and it took me months to learn all of these.

When I became a mother, I decided to do things differently. As soon as my daughter was old enough to walk - not even alone, just by grabbing the furniture -, I started to involve her in housework. She was just over one year old. Yes. 1. I thought that she could learn everything by doing things in a playful way.

First, I asked her to take out the items from the grocery bag when we got home from shopping. She handed everything over to me and I put all the stuff away. Then I taught her how to feed the cats. It was her favourite chore.

I also started to notice that she was super talented at taking things out of the drawers and making a huge mess. I thought, 'Well if you can take these out, you should be able to put them back', so I taught her how to put her toys away.

I involved her in different chores month by month. Now she is 3 and in addition to what I have mentioned above, she has to put her toys away, put her plate and fork in the kitchen sink after meals, set the dishwasher, help me hand the clothes on laundry days, collect her own clothes once they are dry, put chocolate wraps (or other packaging) in the trash can and she also helps me in the kitchen. She loves cooking and baking and as I started teaching her how to work in the kitchen at a very young age, she knows how to make, say, a sponge cake without making a huge mess. In fact, I make a bigger mess than she does.

Other parents have told me that I'm cruel and I don't let my kid be a kid, I deprive her of a happy and carefree childhood but I don't agree with these people. She goes to kindergarten and the other kids in her group are older than she is (4-5years old). Last year, at a parent-teacher meeting the teachers asked the parents to involve the kids in housework because although the teachers were trying to ask them to put away their toys and simple things like that, most of the kids didn't help because they weren't used to it. One of the teachers recommended some household chores, such as sweeping, wiping the table or simple things like that.

Of course, there are days when my daughter is too tired to put away everything. For such cases, I bought her a pink bunny basket.

When playtime is over but she's too tired, she doesn't have to put things back on the shelves or into the drawer. She only has to pick up all her toys from the floor and throw them in the bunny basket.

The basket then goes to the corner for the night and the following day, we can go through the items and put everything in place. If you have ever stepped on wooden toys, Barbie dolls, LEGO or Duplo, you know why I want her to remove stuff from the floor. Just imaging having to go check on her because she's crying, you enter the dark room in the middle of the night and step on something. Ouch.

What do you think? Do children have to do housework? Did you do housework when you were a kid? If you are a parent, do you involve your children in housework?

(title image: "Designed by Freepik", bunny basket photos: my own)
When we hear the word 'detox', we often think about the detoxication of our bodies. What we tend to forget, though, is that our souls and lives also need to be cleansed every now and then.

Doing a life detox was a huge step for me. A lot has happened in my life in the past three years and making the first step on the road to mental and emotional balance wasn't easy. A life detox, for me, meant to cut certain people out of my life, leave bad and toxic habits behind and start new, healthier and more productive habits.

I have suffered from anxiety all my life. When my daughter was born, it has become intolerable and by the time my daughter, Janka was 3 months old I had developed something like a mid-life crisis. I was feeling that the world around me was about to collapse, I didn't want to go back to my full-time job, I wanted to fulfil my decade-long dream of becoming a translator and interpreter and I had a five-year-long drama with my ex-husband regarding the business we used to have and it was hovering over my head like a sword. My anxiety was so severe that I can hardly remember anything from the period between February and June 2017. Anxiety was the Number 1 thing I had to get rid of or at least learn to control, so I went to therapy. After some assessment, my psychologist and I started to work on something that's called an 'anxiety hierarchy'. It means that you make a list of what makes you anxious. The one that causes the most anxiety is at the top of the list. Once you have finished the list, you start brainstorming the possible outcomes, both negative and positive. One option is that you realise that what seemed to be a gigantic problem is, in fact, not a big deal or you come up with a possible solution.

Cutting people out of your life
This is the hardest thing to do but you must do it. Cut out negative and toxic people or anyone who pulls you down. In my case, it meant even deleting people from the contacts list of my phone.

Social media
Oh, yes. Social media. It's so difficult to stay away from it, isn't it? The last step of the social aspect of my life detox was to go through all the websites where I had an account and if it was something negative or I was no longer using it, I deleted myself.
I also dedicated an entire afternoon going through my friends list on Facebook (the most toxic of them all, I think) and I defriended everyone who posted negative or hateful content and banned several people. It was such a relief!

Picking up new habits
In December, a friend of mine organised a two-day training where the participant could get to know themselves better and make short-, mid-, and long-term plans. I learnt a lot during those two days and now I'm trying to build new habits into my life, such as budgeting, more self-care, self-respect and writing a gratitude log.

Have you ever done a life detox? How did you do it? Did it work? Leave your answers in the comments section down below.

I have read a lot about colour theories and colour psychology. There are things that are true for me but a lot of theories just don't work in my case. Here's how I feel about different colours.

Let's start by talking about my wardrobe. A few years ago I decided to limit the colours I wear to white, black, pink and green. It might sound nonsense but actually, it had a lot of positive effects on me. First of all, I only wear colours that affect my mood in a positive way. Secondly, as I have limited colours in my wardrobe, I spend less time in front of my wardrobe every morning, trying to figure out what to wear.
I have a yellow top, a light blue shirt and a red dress but most of the colours I wear are different shades of the ones I have mentioned above.

Pink is my happy colour. I find it youthful, joyful and refreshing - in this aspect, I agree with colour psychology. I have fair hair and skin, so a lot of shades of pink look good on me.

Green is a colour that I used to hate when I was younger. However, a few years ago I realised that the jewel tone of green or emerald green does not only suit me as a thirty-something woman but it also balances out the rosacea I have. According to colour psychology, green is the colour of safety, envy and nature. For me, it is also a colour of wisdom and confidence.

White is regarded as the colour of innocence and cleanliness. It a very cold and sterile colour but I love wearing it. It's very classy. If I can't decide what to wear or I have to go somewhere to interpret, this is what I always choose. In Hungary, kids always have to wear black trousers/skirts and a white blouse or shirt, so it's the perfect colour for any special occasion.

Black is a favourite of mine. It's classy, bold and reflects professionalism and every time I wear black, I feel more flirtatious than in any other colour. In marketing, it is used to express luxury and formality.
Some members of my family hate it, though. My husband and mother think that it's a very sad colour and they associate it with death and grief. (That's the reason my mother never wears black.)

I have mixed feelings about this colour. It is thought to be the colour of energy and excitement and a lot of people associate it with Halloween. We don't celebrate Halloween in Hungary, but I love the pumpkin shade and falling leaves kind of shade of it. The vibrant versions are not my thing. It also makes me thirsty. It's definitely not my favourite colour.

I read it somewhere that purple is a soothing colour that it's the colour of wisdom. It might be true if you look at illustrations of witches, sorcerers, magicians, etc., this colour is often present in some form.
I have liked this colour since I was a teenager. Not the pastel shades, but the stronger, more vibrant versions as they boost my creativity.

Yellow is the colour of sunshine, right? It's a very happy and energetic colour. I was surprised to read in an article that it's the colour of frustration and aggression. I'm not sure if I agree with it.
I have only one yellow piece of clothing. It's a T-shirt and I love it. People say that I shouldn't wear it because I'm blonde but if put the right accessories and the right kind of makeup, it really suits me. And it also puts me in a positive mood. The only thing I don't like about it, though, is that it attracts wasps.

Let's move on to the colours I absolutely hate.

I have a royal blue mini dress and a light blue blouse with white stripe and a beautiful white embroidered detail. In also have dark blue jeans but other than these, I just can't stand it. When we moved into our house, one of the rooms was painted baby blue and it literally made me depressed. When my husband started to repaint to a neutral colour, he had a migraine after half an hour spent in that room and I could totally understand why.
Blue is the colour that makes me depressed, anxious and numb. I can't understand why some people see it as an inspiring colour and the colour of productivity. It totally blocks my brain.

I don't think there is a colour I could hate more. Almost all the women I know say that it makes them feel confident. As far as I'm concerned, it's okay on my nails for a few days but I can't wear it. Remember the dress I mentioned earlier? My husband bought it for me. Wearing red stresses me out so much that I have worn it only twice and now I'm thinking of selling it. It makes me stressed and anxious and it's so severe that at Christmas, I can't stand the old fashioned red and green colour combo and last year as I was making an inventory of my Christmas decorations, all of the red ornaments ended either in the trash can or I gave them away to my mother.
I studied psychology at university and one of my teachers said that owners of red cars cause more accidents than those people who drive cars of any other colour because these people tend to be more aggressive than other drivers.

I don't know. What do you think?

Brown is such a sad and meaningless colour for me! It's okay as a part of autumn decoration but there's something about it that I just hate. It is thought to be the colour of strength, comfort and warmth but it has a negative effect on me.

What do you think about the theories I wrote about in this post? What is your favourite colour? What effect do these colours have on you?

I have used up almost all the space in my bullet journal that I started In January, so I ordered a new notebook and migrated my stuff.

In January, I started to use a colourful, fun bullet journal that I ordered at Aliexpress. This time, I picked a plain pink one which is very simple but very feminine. I'll include some the photos of the different pages here but if you want to know more about this migration, head over to my YouTube channel to watch a more detailed video. I'll add the link after the photos.

And here is the video:

I hope you liked this setup. My July setup is coming soon. If you have any suggestions for themes for the rest of the year, leave a comment down below. I would love to read your ideas.

Summer isn't my favourite month because I can't stand the heat. There are some things I love about it, though. Here comes a practical approach to why I like summer.

1. Clothes dry faster
It's one of the best things about the season. I do the laundry, hand the clothes in the backyard (so I don't use the precious and limited space in the house), they dry in no time and I can do another round of laundry.

2. We need less time to get ready in the morning
Fewer layers of clothing, less time to get ready. Do I have to say more?

3. It's easier and faster to shop for clothes
The reason is the same as in Part 2. Fewer layers, fewer pieces of clothing to get rid of before trying on something. Easy and fast.

4. No heating, more savings
We heat our house with gas. In the summer months, we use for cooking only because we don't need heating obviously. Therefore, we save quite a lot of money.

5. The garden is gorgeous
When we bought our house in 2013, there was nothing in the backyard but sand and weeds. The sand was so horrible and runny that it was almost like liquid. We also had major level differences, so fixing the backyard could have been a DIY project. We needed a team of professional workers, an engineer to design the backyard and really serious machinery. And even with these, the garden fixing project took 5 weeks.
2020 is the first year in 6 years when we have a proper garden with lawn, flowers, bushes and a small vegetable garden. Being out in the sun is wonderful and gardening gives me so much joy that I can't even describe!

6. There is a wide variety of fruit and vegetables
Nothing is better than tomatoes when they are season. I just love them! Although I like almost every kind of fruit and vegetables, there is nothing like asparagus, watermelons, peaches, cherries, home-grown tomatoes and bell peppers.

7. The sun rises earlier
I'm an early bird. I get up at 5.30 in the morning, even at weekends, so waking up to sunshine is essential for me. Our kitchen is in the eastern part of our house, so having breakfast and watching the sunrise from the kitchen window is priceless.

These are my favourite things about summer. What do you like about summer? Which is your favourite season?

(image: "Designed by Freepik")
This is the story of my online dating career which I have decided to give up. Why? Because there are too many creepy guys out there. Read this post to learn more.

This cake is easy to make, requires no baking skills, yet it’s heavenly and in this version, there is no added sugar. Ideal if you are on a diet.